The Me That I Am

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Tuesday, February 07, 2012

KNOW YOUR LANE

You know, Madame O (Oprah Winfrey) gave some great advice when she said, in an interview with Piers Morgan, “I know my lane”. Piers’ question was about running for President but what she said can easily be applied to life.

A rule of thumb for the way I live my life, has been embracing who you are right NOW and experiencing this moment to its fullest. One thing I know for sure is that when you try to deviate from the present moment awareness is when we experience “dis-ease”. It’s like trying to put the square peg in the round hole. It just won’t work and even if you can get it in, it never fits quite right and it hurts like hell going through the process.what she said can easily be applied to life.

I guess one of the recent things that I have discovered is that if someone knows what lane they occupy and they function well there – quite often it’s not for us to try and move them to the lane that we are in or where we think that they should be.

The epiphany came when I was recently traveling in Miami on I-95. While I was driving, it was

my decision to get into the HOV lane, pay an additional toll and move a bit faster than the other traffic. It hit me! 1) Not everybody is equipped to drive in the HOV lane and 2) some people are content going with the flow of traffic around them! Who would have thought that a drive would give me that much insight into life?

As I drove further, I thought about the exit that I would take. I was headed to Miami Beach en route to a Villa. On the way, I stopped at a store in Liberty City.

Now for those that know the Miami area ---Liberty City is the hood. I love my people and the hood will always be a part of me and my experience but I had a knowing that I would go farther. There are still some people that will get off of the expressway [of life] and be content staying right there [in Liberty City]. Even though, they know full well that only 10 miles or so away are some of the best beaches, most amazing restaurants and luxurious pads in the world. What’s even more important is that you can’t fault folk for knowing their lane and maximizing what’s there.

When you truly know your lane, you can make great decisions about where you are going and where you need to be.

I will always keep in my mind the directions to MY Liberty City because I know that the food is good, the people are real and there is always a lesson in the trip. Nevertheless, I know that my radar points toward Buckingham Palace and the United Nations and even the White House!

Yes, I know my direction and I have no problem switching lanes. How about you?

Friday, December 30, 2011

Random

So I am having a moment today and I think that I just realized that I don’t know “how” to be in a relationship! Can you believe that it took me 35 years to figure that out? I suppose there is not specific rhyme or reason as to how it works. Indeed that is the beauty of being with someone. Though, I am never one to say that things are fineto, I recently told a friend that I’m taking a break. Let’s see how that goes!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

SPRING CLEANING

Lesson: My External Circumstances, Reflect My Internal Condition

Last night during a period of meditation, it struck me why things weren't going as I thought that they should. It was less about my circumstances and more about my condition.

You see over the winter months, I had allowed my office and bedroom to develop clutter. I thought because I had organized the "stuff" into piles that things were fine. In the end, it was the stuff that was the cause of problems. There were clothes that I hadn't worn in years, files I hadn't used in months and cords that went to who knows what electronic device of the day. And that was just the physical stuff, mentally there were remnants of past relationships that were in the "bin" waiting to be discarded but never went anywhere.

Regardless if I held on to these things or not, none of the things (or people) that were destined to come into my life could because there was too much other "stuff" in the way! Indeed I was blocking my blessings.

I spent the day mentally clearing out all of those places that were dark and cluttered with stuff. I re-gathered all of the hurts, heart aches and disappointments for one final trip. As I went through the sorting process, I made sure that I didn't look at those experiences as bad or negative but tried to learn a lesson from each one! As I cleaned mentally, I cleaned physically as well. I discarded all of the clothes, old cell phones, magazines, papers and anything that took up space and had no value. I even reassessed some things that I thought valuable and learned there was really no value there at all.

After that exercise, I feel lighter, better and more in-tune with my environment. I can truly say that I am ready mentally and physically for the things and people that the universe has in store for me. What a difference just a day and a little cleaning can make in your life.

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Indeed I Am Crying . . . .

Just for a moment there was a tear on my cheek and I had no idea why. . . .

Indeed I was crying.

Crying for unintended consequence and the time to recompense.

Indeed I was crying. . . .

Iyanlya said a good cry with a purpose was all I needed but instead of an agenda – I just needed my space.

I just needed to release the pain of pleasure and feel the lack of knowledge that made me into the man that I was.

Searching and never finding.

Feeling and never knowing.

Being and never embracing. Indeed at this moment I was crying.

In the depth of my thought, I could see the place to heal my soul and dry the well that gushed.

Yet seeing and obtaining are two different things.

I cry because you hurt.

I cry because I love.

I cry because we are destined to try . . .

Just for a moment there was a tear on my cheek and I had no idea why . . .

Indeed I was crying.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Trapped in Love (Seat 6B)

I travel quite often and my two favorite airlines know my penchant for having aisle seats. Maybe it’s because I try to drink a gallon of water a day and want quick access to the facilities. Or maybe it’s because I just don’t want to disturb anyone if I feel like getting up. At the end of the day, the main reason is that I just don’t want to feel trapped.

I guess the same holds true with relationships.

Why do comfortable relationships with attachments make us run? I suppose that it is the feeling of being trapped. Maybe that’s why it seems like there are more open relationships and less firm commitments these days. People want to be able to exit quickly. I guess, I am under the perception that if we are in this together then we are in this together. Meaning quite simply – I’ve you got your back and you’ve got mine.

I guess as I sit in 6B and travel home, I too have an exit strategy for getting to the restroom and as it would appear for getting out of relationships. You know as I think about it – when I have had to take a window seat there is a really great view and someplace to rest my head! Relationships too offer hidden comforts but most of us choose to look at the drawbacks.

As the journey continues so do the lessons. Perhaps as time progresses, I will take a window seat without being forced. Then, just maybe the journey will be the start of an event stronger foundation.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Text-ed: Is That Really A Word?

So I am sitting on a plane the other day and I hear someone in conversation with a friend.

“Girl, I texted him and he didn’t even text me back”, she said.

As she spoke my hair stood on end. Did she really mean that? Of course not, I thought. I dismissed it.

A few days later a popular show came on TV and the character said that he “texted” someone. Again, I am thinking – “how did this get though network censors”?

Again, in conversation someone said, “I texted you that number the other day”. By this time I was out done. I knew that I had taught English before and from everything that I had learned as a teacher ‘texted’ was not a word. Of course I did the requisite research on-line and there in the Urban Dictionary the word ‘texted’ what right in front of me. Then again this was the Urban Dictionary so did that really make it a reliable source?

It’s just in all that had learned over the years – I was really over hearing the words ‘texted’ or ‘texting’. But what could I do? Truthfully, nothing! I am a purist on most things so in my estimation the proper thing would have been to say, “ I sent you a text message” or “I was sending a text message to you”. Then again who really does things the proper way?

So I will have to suck it up and hear people conjugate words in all types of weird ways. I guess at the end of the day we just make it up as we go along – that is the American way!